Advice on Relationships

Poll

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Author:
Cucan Pemo Publications

Is creating a healthy, happy relationship with the love of your life a dream for you? Not at all, if you would learn some fundamental principles to keeping and maintaining a happy relationship. The principles discussed here can also be applied to all your human relationships - whether it's with your child, your friends, your co-worker, or even your boss!

1) Acceptence And Forgiveness

Don’t try to change someone. This is a must. If a person really wants to change, that person will need to be motivated and take action. Period. And if you seriously desire and hope to see the changes you like to see in you partner. Here's the secret. Do not make your desire to change him/her looks like your desire to change him/her!

Also regarding acceptance, accept limitations. He is not Superman; you are not Wonder woman. No one is perfect; so do not expect perfection. Accept the little flaws that come with each person. You accept theirs; they accept yours.

If and when things get out of hand and it is your fault, apologize and ask forgiveness and move on. Similarly, be acceptable to apologies and grant forgiveness, too. Life is too short to stay focused on the negative too long. No need to deny it; face it, deal with it and move on past it to improve and strengthen your relationships. And learn to forgive and forget. That’s life!

2) Bonding And Communication

Bonding with another person generally does take time. Learn the art of good communication. Talk, listen, share the good and the bad, ask questions, compliment instead of nag or insult.

In short be a friend; make a friend. Your partner has been your friend, and today he is still your best friend. Things happen from time to time and cancellations are a part of life. The best of friends expect nothing from the other person. There is only love. Check judgmental attitudes at the door. That is healthy. Always remember this, if you go into a relationship to change another person and demanding your mate communicate and bond with you the way you want it, you are heading for touble, and your relationship will go downhill. Period.

If this bonding is lacking, it may mean professional help is needed (like a counselor or therapist) or it may be time to learn to draw in your true love.

3) Expectations And Human Nature

Movies, romance novels and television shows often portray life, especially human relationships, very differently than it is in the real world – this is no secret. How many people really always look like movie stars, have zero health ailments, endless income without hardly ever going to work, fabulous cars and homes, friends and family who totally adore them and come to their beckon call, no long-term problems because they all end so quickly, etc.? And who can battle serious issues like one person having an affair with someone else, and wrap the whole storyline up in two hours?

Get real. Expect a little less than the media portray and learn more about humans by joining the real world scenario. Learn all you can about human nature and human relationship if you have the change. This course of study is a fasinating subject. You'll learn more about your-self and your partner in ways you have never known before.

The bottomline is, always remember that whatever you need is already here, within you, within your reach. You do not have to search for your power from other people. If you shift your center onto another person and expect him or her to hold your core structure for you, you are bound to have a failing relationship and suffer from a broken heart.

About the Author : Cucan Pemo is the Best Selling Author for her unconventional Relationship Ebooks at http://www.RetrieveALover.com/home.htm Discover the best and most effective strategies to finding a true love, keeping a true love or even bringing back a lost lover or spouse! FREE MP3 training programs also available at one of her Best family site at http://www.FamilyAndRelationships.com. Source: www.isnare.com

A Quick Note From The Publisher... If you like the article above, you may be interested in the following article which is also related to Improve Relationships... Relationship Exercises for Couples On a piece of paper, in a notebook or in your journal answer the following series of questions. Do this to learn about yourself and your relationship, but you can also suggest that your partner do the same. You can do this on a yearly basis, say January 1st every year. Exercise Number 1 Do you recall the beginning of your relationship, when you first fell in love? Describe your behavior. Describe your partner's behavior. Too often in a long-term relationship partners stop the very behaviors that connected them with one another in the first place, but transcendent reality. Some common examples are: Do you remember looking deeply into one another's eyes? Do you remember how easy concentrated attention was? Do you remember those compliments and gifts, etc.? What do you do that is the same? What do you no longer do? What has your partner stopped doing? What behaviors would you like to restore to your relationship? Exercise Number 2 What behaviors bother you most about your partner? Are these issues similar to issues from your past? If so, what part do you play in implanting the negative behaviors in your partner? How could you change your behavior to encourage a more positive response? Copyright 2005 Linda Miles Ph.D About the Author Author, Dr. Linda Miles, is deeply committed to helping individuals and couples achieve rewarding relationships. She co-authored an award-winning book, The New Marriage: Transcending the Happily-Ever-After Myth, and CD's, The Train Your Brain series. http://www.drlindamiles.com...