Advice on Relationships

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Author:
Pat Swan, M.S., Life and Relationship Coach, Speaker, Trainer and Author

Relationships hold a high place for most of us, especially women. We want great relationships with clear communication, empathy, understanding, mutual trust and friendship and fantastic sex - we want DYNAMITE RELATIONSHIPS.

But what do we get much of the time? Relationships loaded with communication
problems, irritability, conflict, misunderstandings, blame, hurt and anger! If you have a relationship like this you know what I mean. Stress grows and settles in your muscles and organs and you develop fibromyalgia, migraines, stomach problems, anxiety and depression.

Loyalty, tradition and fear of failure demand we stay. We try again and again to fix the problems, ignore the fighting, and say the same thing for the tenth time with different words. Do you identify with this situation? Perhaps you stuff resentment and deny personal needs for the sake of the relationship. You experience little explosions on a daily basis and feel constantly on edge. Then it's Monday morning and we play pretend again for another week.

Walking through these relationship mine fields is hazardous to your health.

The longer that relationship stress goes on, the longer your immune system is shut down, and the longer your muscles and organs are exposed to dangerous stress hormones. You are at risk. If you have an illness, it will get worse. If you have no illness yet, you will likely get one.

What can you do? Whatever you do, don't wait! Magical thinking tells us that it will change on its own. It won't. You have to change. Your health and well being depend on it. But the good news is, you can make a difference. It is not necessarily a lost cause.

Here are the top ten tips for building DYNAMITE RELATIONSHIPS.

1.Get to know yourself, inside and out. Know what you want and need. Know what you like. Determine your values and priorities. Write them down. Believe in yourself and don't compromise.

2.Choose healthy relationships from the start. Don't go out looking for a red dress and settle for beige! Don't be desperate - be choosey!

3.Move slowly and develop a strong foundation. Don't get enmeshed in an emotional relationship before you see the hazards and recognize the danger.

4.Nurture good relationships. Take the first step to schedule a get together or just chat on the phone.

5.Develop excellent communication and conflict resolution skills, and use them. This in itself can drastically change a relationship.

6.Develop assertiveness skills. Passive people ignore their needs and get walked on. Aggressive people walk on others to get what they want. Assertive people learn to get their needs met without walking on anyone.

7.Learn to really listen. Listen with body, mind and spirit.

8.Be self-aware. When a misunderstanding happens, check it out. Be sure you have all the information. Determine what part you played in the situation.

9.Develop intuition and body awareness so you can identify relationship stress in your body immediately, as it is happening. Then deal with it appropriately before it gets deadly.

10.Lose the denial. If something isn't right, deal with it. Don't play pretend and wake up too late. All relationships have misunderstandings. It's how we deal with them that counts.

If you find yourself struggling with your relationships, new or long term, don't wait! The window of opportunity for change is narrow. Anger and resentment destroy relationships, even good ones. Life and Relationship Coaching can help you reach your goals and develop the DYNAMITE RELATIONSHIPS you desire.

About the Author
Pat Swan, M.S., Life and Relationship Coach, Speaker, Trainer and Author. Check out her ebook, "Watch Out! Your Relationships Can Be Hazardous To Your Health." Available at www.StopRelationshipStress.com Call for a FREE 30 minute introductory coaching session today. 262-642-5706, mailto:pat@patswan.com , http://www.RelationshipSkillville.com; http://www.StopRelationshipStress.com .

A Quick Note From The Publisher... If you like the article above, you may be interested in the following article which is also related to Improve Relationships... Improve Your Relationships Through Vastu Do you want be in a relationship that brings you deep fulfillment and love? Or perhaps you want a more satisfying connection with that one person already in your life? Would you like to have a deeply rewarding relationship with yourself? >From a Vastu perspective, if your home is not in proper balance, those things that you desire most in life can elude you causing sadness, disappointment, and lost opportunities. Relationships, like other areas of your life, can be compromised when your home is not in balance with the natural forces that permeate the world and our Universe. In nature all five elements (earth, water, fire, air and space) are in balance. When building, very little attention is placed on the importance of creating a structure that benefits the well-being and happiness of the inhabitants or that brings in support from solar and magnetic energies. Have you ever experienced walking into a home that made you feel uncomfortable for no apparent reason? Or entered a home where you felt wonderful and relaxed? It is the subtleties in our world that have great impact on us. Some people are attuned to the environment and can sense this harmony or disharmony more readily. But for most, we are not as aware of the impact our surroundings have on us. We are conscious of the symptoms of disharmony – unhappiness, stress, arguments, and discontent, but rarely if ever do we consider that the underlying causes could come from our environment. Vastu Shastra is the architectural science that can create maximum harmony in a relationship through a unique process of balancing the five elements in your home. It allows for the beneficial energy to be readily available to support your desire for peace, happiness, and fulfillment. Here’s how it works: As a part of this...